SEO Basics: If Thou Wouldst Be Perfect (How to Improve Your Bounce Rate)
By: Patrick Yambrick
Published: Monday, Mar 9, 2026
Last Edit: Monday, Mar 9, 2026
Want to skip past the politics and religion and get right to the real lesson? Be My Guest.
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I don't fancy myself a prophet, savior, or anything like that. I also do not mean to appropriate any struggles. This is just what is on my mind - and the minds of many - right now. I struggle to write laser-focused SEO pieces while we do whatever it is that we are doing in the world. Enjoy, and Let Me Know if anything I say or do is against the rules.
- End Disclaimer.
My intention here is to look at a political administration which I believe - though since I can't prove it with objective evidence, I won't claim it as "truth" - uses religion as a guise for manipulation, through the lens of my personal connection to God, Jesus, or whatever powers may be.
Like it or not, national political and religious tides have an impact on local small businesses. I am not going to dive into that analysis in this post. Just know that it is real. My mom ran a business during and just after the 2008 Financial Crisis. So: no source, no stats - it just does.
Take Me To Church.
I don't fancy myself a prophet, savior, or anything like that. I also do not mean to appropriate any struggles. This is just what is on my mind - and the minds of many - right now. I struggle to write laser-focused SEO pieces while we do whatever it is that we are doing in the world. Enjoy, and Let Me Know if anything I say or do is against the rules.
My sincerest hope is that many of my readers can launch successful small businesses which leverage my technical and general knowledge to boost themselves.
I hope for this because I know that many of my friends work hard and pay taxes because they want to see social good done with their money.
And for those that do prefer to keep to themselves socially - they care that their taxes go into building and maintaining our infrastructure, and toward defending our shared home.
Sure enough, instead of that, those dollars are going to - ah, this can't be right...
Billionaires manipulating the oil market to strategically Drive Your Gas Prices Up.
Let me plug a book here, by Ron Chernow - called Titan. Titan is a biography about another billionaire: John D. Rockefeller - and his merry band of "barons" - who made their money by forming an oil trust and using their influence to... you guessed it...
...manipulate the oil market to strategically drive consumer prices up.
(Even though the prices went down overall.)
Let's Talk About JC.
Do you remember when I claimed in My Last Article that Johnny Cash is my cousin?
I still don't know whether that's true. I did spend some time during my youth in Tennessee, in Carter County (shout out Elizabethton).
I hope it didn't offend anyone when I referenced those witches. Sometimes divinity looks like sorcery to a non-believer.
Cash Is King.
Who's Cash?
The Man In Black's Cash.
Not to be confused with the Chicken in Black.
Who's that?
The Chicken in Black - or, the Manhattan Flash.
Who's that?
An orange bank robber from New York City.
Are you guys tired of The Simpsons calling it yet?
And that some thought Johnny Was a Prophet.
Mr. Cash stood for the poor, the downtrodden, the sick, the addicts, Native Americans, and those in need.
What do you stand for?
Fear No Evil
"In the Lord put I my trust: how say ye to my soul, Flee as a bird to your mountain?
For, lo, the wicked bend their bow, they make ready their arrow upon the string, that they may privily shoot at the upright in heart.
If the foundations be destroyed, what can the righteous do?
The Lord is in his holy temple, the Lord's throne is in heaven: his eyes behold, his eyelids try, the children of men.
The Lord trieth the righteous: but the wicked and him that loveth violence his soul hateth.
Upon the wicked he shall rain snares, fire and brimstone, and an horrible tempest: this shall be the portion of their cup.
For the righteous Lord loveth righteousness; his countenance doth behold the upright."
I didn't go to church growing up - my dad rightly didn't trust The Priests.
That doesn't mean we didn't put our faith in ol' JC - he raised me on Psalm 23:
That taught me to do my best never to Act In Fear.
Many were raised differently from me.
My chief learning from the lessons of Christianity and Catholicism is that we should also do our best to strive toward a Christlike life, however imperfect our effort.
Did you know that when we act in fear, our Amygdala (the part of the brain responsible for aggression) takes over, and our Prefrontal Cortex (the part of the brain responsible for our personality and judgement) shuts off.
I've had a therapist describe it to me as "Clasp one hand into a fist, then wrap your other hand around that fist. When we are angry or anxious, that second, clasped hand goes away, leaving us only with the fist of fear."
Did you know that alcohol ramps that effect?
What do you think - should we rename Operation Epic Fury?
A Pale Rider Cometh
"For precept must be upon precept, precept upon precept; line upon line, line upon line; here a little, and there a little:
For with stammering lips and another tongue will he speak to this people.
To whom he said, This is the rest wherewith ye may cause the weary to rest; and this is the refreshing: yet they would not hear.
But the word of the Lord was unto them precept upon precept, precept upon precept; line upon line, line upon line; here a little, and there a little; that they might go, and fall backward, and be broken, and snared, and taken.
Wherefore hear the word of the Lord, ye scornful men, that rule this people which is in Jerusalem.
Because ye have said, We have made a covenant with death, and with hell are we at agreement; when the overflowing scourge shall pass through, it shall not come unto us: for we have made lies our refuge, and under falsehood have we hid ourselves:
Therefore thus saith the Lord God, Behold, I lay in Zion for a foundation a stone, a tried stone, a precious corner stone, a sure foundation: he that believeth shall not make haste.
Judgment also will I lay to the line, and righteousness to the plummet: and the hail shall sweep away the refuge of lies, and the waters shall overflow the hiding place.
And your covenant with death shall be disannulled, and your agreement with hell shall not stand; when the overflowing scourge shall pass through, then ye shall be trodden down by it."
This is Stephen Miller.
He is just a guy.
An advisor to the president or something - I don't know that much about politics.
I have heard that he is a pretty competent speech writer, and that he is a master of subtle influence.
You tell me.
I am not a sensationalist. I am proud to be an American.
I refuse to believe that Stephen Miller is the second coming of Joseph Goebbels.
Nor can it be said that Stephen Miller is a real-life Grima Wormtongue.
And under absolutely no circumstances is anybody to believe that Stephen Miller is the Grey Eminence of Our Nation.
I shouldn't cast doubt onto our elected officials. They are under enough pressure.
What's that? Stephen Miller is Not An Elected Official?
Hm.
Why Do You Care So Much About What The Administration Is Doing?
I care because many of my friends are of various Native and Latin American lineages - in many cases, it's both.
Did you know my other cousin was Buck Cross from The Young Riders?
Yep. Gregg Rainwater, also from Flint.
That one I know for certain.
Regardless of my very real familial (via one of my many grandmas) connection to Mr. Rainwater, or my dubious relationship to Johnny Cash - who spent significant time and energy championing the rights and fighting for the Natives of this land - I believe that what we are doing goes too far.
Like Mr. Cash, I understand that things can't be perfect sunshine and rainbows every day.
As I said in a previous article: "Sometimes we get smacked by the consequences of our own actions."
The more broadly we apply that to "them," the more fervently it will be applied to "us" when the tables inevitably turn.
They most always do.
Where will you stand when the game of musical chairs comes to an end? Will you be righteous still?
SEO Basics - How To Decrease Your Bounce Rate
Creating engaging, mixed media content like this that keeps users coming back for more is the best way to decrease (improve) your Bounce Rate. Now you know.
Clicking or tapping on any of these screenshots will take you to the article I posted which prompted my checking my bounce rate for that screen shot.
What Does All This Mean For Your Small Business And You?
It means that no matter who you are in this world, you can climb the golden ladder if you act with courage, benevolence, and righteousness.
Why not you, too?
If you fear no evil: drop one piece of that project you've been sitting on this week and watch the water ripple.
Thanks for Reading
Thank you for reading 'SEO Basics: How to Read Graphs (Women's Day Edition)'! Want to share your story or have your words heard? Reach out to me and let's discuss the possibilities.